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End of the year bargains, maybe

He sold it. The sale fell through. He’s spent the “proceeds.” Now he’sup a creek without a paddle. He needs to sell the property again and it’s the end of the year. He needs the money by December 31.

You have money. Make a ridiculous bid.

If he’s “insulted” by your ultra-low offer, that’s his problem.

The biggest determinant of success in real estate is what you paid for it. That you can control.

Then, of course, there’s luck, location and financing.

When it’s too good to be true. It definitely is.

I see startups with “projections” showing a loss of $345,000 this year growing to a profit of $189 million five years hence.

What moron puts out such absurd projections?

From the Wall Street Journal:

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alittleblood
Theranos founder Elizabeth Holmes at the WSJDLive conference in Laguna Beach, Calif., in October 2015.

Writes the Journal:

While soliciting investors in 2014 and 2015, Theranos Inc. predicted revenue of nearly $2 billion and net income of about $505 million this year, according to investor materials from the blood-testing startup.

The projections help show how Theranos and founder Elizabeth Holmes attracted more than $632 million in its latest funding round, which included the period when the investor materials were distributed. The Wall Street Journal reviewed a copy of the documents.

Theranos also said it expected 2015 revenue of nearly $1 billion and net income of about $330 million, suggesting the company would roughly double in size in 2016, the documents show. Theranos envisioned fast-growing partnerships with drugstores, hospitals, doctors and drugmakers.

I believe Theranos is basically out of business. Many investors — some of whom put in $100 million — now expect to lose all their money.

She is a pretty girl, decked out in black polonecks, like Steve Jobs. But she’s no Steve Jobs.

Read the Journal’s article here.

I get “decks.”

No one sends docs. They all send “decks.” They’re PowerPoints without real information, like risks.

Yesterday I received a 15 page one that had one page turned 90 degrees counter clockwise and one page that was upside down (I don’t make this up) and no information on the principals.  That came in a later email, “Forgot our bio’s, very important piece of decision-making process!”

P.S. They’re projecting a 49% IRR on a five year hold. Not  in Theranos class, but still impressive.

Don’t see Manchester By The Sea

manchester

It’s too depressing, too sad and too long.

The Widex Beyond 440 hearing aid

Does anyone have this new hearing aid?

widexbeyond440

How is it? Does it work? It has one huge feature — you can adjust it via software on your iPhone. And you can adjust it yourself. which might make sense since prices for the Widex Beyond 440 hearing aid range from $3,500 to $5,000.

If you don’t like it after 45 days, you can return it. Some places take it back for free. Others charge as much as $500 — which is pricey for a glorified “testdrive.”

My audiologist says I need a hearing aid. And this one is the best. My ego says I’m not old and don’t need one. Susan says I’m old and need one. Meanwhile, I’m training her to speak louder. This is not working.

Silly, but fun, cartoons

If it works for my computer…

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Think of this one the next time you visit a financial “advisor” or broker.

tinglyfeeling

The next one works also with numbers you recognize, but don’t want to speak to. A mother-in-law?

unknowncaller

HarryNewton
Harry Newton, who advises never EVER open an attachment to an email — even on your iPhone. From the latest issue of Vanity Fair:

What if a government could wirelessly control any iPhone? Last summer a University of California grad student named Bill Marczak stumbled across a piece of spyware that would do just that.

He found the software could turn on the iPhone’s microphone even when you’re not talking on it. You can buy this illicit software. Read the amazing story here.  Remember, don’t open email attachments — without checking the sender first.