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9:00 AM ET, Tuesday, December 22, 2009: Spent yesterday checking on an offshore private equity investment. Some of the investments are good. Some are bad. The overall results are semi-awful. But hope reigns supreme, like all my other private equity investments with Goldman Sachs and Citigroup Down, but not out. At least not out enough for them to stop paying themselves fees.

Then checked into some possible stockmarket index investments. Nothing of excitement to report this morning.

When in doubt, stay out. Cash remains king.

Spent most of last night drinking the most awful stuff to get ready for this morning's colonoscopy -- just a checkup. What a wonderfully easy way to lose weight. I haven't eaten since Sunday night. This gives excitement a whole meaning.

I promise to be brilliant and funny tomorrow. It's too early.

This column is about my personal search for the perfect investment. I don't give investment advice. For that you have to be registered with regulatory authorities, which I am not. I am a reporter and an investor. I make my daily column -- Monday through Friday -- freely available for three reasons: Writing is good for sorting things out in my brain. Second, the column is research for a book I'm writing called "In Search of the Perfect Investment." Third, I encourage my readers to send me their ideas, concerns and experiences. That way we can all learn together. My email address is . You can't click on my email address. You have to re-type it . This protects me from software scanning the Internet for email addresses to spam. I have no role in choosing the Google ads on this site. Thus I cannot endorse any, though some look interesting. If you click on a link, Google may send me money. Please note I'm not suggesting you do. Read more about Google AdSense, click here and here.