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9:00 AM EDT, Thursday, September 3, 2009: We have an expression in Australia, where I was born, that the stockmarket goes up and down faster than a whore's drawers. I was pleased to read Bloomberg this morning:

Sept. 3 (Bloomberg) -- Stocks in China rose the most in six months, driving the yen and Treasuries lower, on speculation the government will adopt measures to boost equities after the Shanghai Composite Index fell into a bear market. (That meant it had recently fallen 20%).

Which brings me to STEC, my recent favorite. It bounced back a couple of bucks yesterday. I don't know why.

Commodities like gold, silver, platinum, copper have risen strongly this year. It's hard to understand why since the world economy has been so weak. One story is that China has been stockpiling. I did not see the commodities boom of 2009.

Everyone who writes a daily column on the market is always looking for something clever to impress their readers or clients (some of whom also read).

Ira Schnell, at Kaufman Bros. wrote the following in today's Morning Note:

After showing some cracks in the foundation over the last few days, I got the sense yesterday that people were content to look for further evidence of a breakdown before they need to start kicking out their longs and/or laying the shorts out again….Almost like everyone was waiting around looking for someone else to make the first move…Certainly cant blame institutional or retail investors for acting this way, because over the last few months, if you sold after initial cracks in the foundation formed, you got very burned.

Combine that with the fact Labor Day is fast approaching, and maybe we get a pause here before the next move (unless Friday’s non farm payroll # is way off consensus, in either direction)…And after virtually 6 months of equities going straight up, I don’t think you can discount the fact that even if they are going to unwind this thing, you might get one last sucker rally right back through 1010 to 1020, before they finally hit this thing through 970 to 980….I talked yesterday about the key role plain vanilla long only funds will ultimately play in dictating price action if selling momentum increases as we roll into 4Q09 (will they buy on the way down or turn sellers?)…Wanted to throw out one more piece of the puzzle…Short sellers have been taken out on stretchers for months now….I know most have been burned to the point that they would rather short only on weakness than try to top tick this market and run the risk of getting steamrolled (again).

So my point here is if the snowball starts to roll down the hill with regard to sell momentum, and the shorts get in motion, what are there expectations for that trade?.....It seems to me that when you get smoked repeatedly with the same strategy, and that strategy finally starts to work, it is human nature to close out the trade too early and lock in your profit, because you just want to right (I am certainly guilty of that on a personal level)…

And not sure that is all that atypical…So what am I saying here?...I think if this market does come off, short covering should come into play maybe a bit earlier than it would normally, thus stemming the down move (at least initially)….Combine that with a 6 month uptrend which has been firmly entrenched, and I think you could certainly make the case the above scenario might take place…

Although it appears that most of the heavy bleeding in the unemployment picture in the US is behind us, the #’s just don’t paint any kind of picture the biggest problem plaguing this economy has abated…The ADP # yesterday still demonstrates that people are losing their jobs at a pretty healthy clip…And the other huge missing piece of the puzzle (the actual hiring of people) still seems like it is very far away….In fact, I saw something the other day that illustrates this point pretty well…The Robert Half Financial Hiring Index says that 84% of CFOs surveyed have no plans on hiring for the rest of 2009….4% expect to add staff, and 10% see more cutbacks (actually up from 8% from the last survey)….Look out for initial claims out @ 8:30 (consensus is 565k, and consensus for continuous claims is 6.125mil), followed by the ISM non manufacturing out @ 10:00 (consensus is 48)

How Federer does it. There are many people who believe he's the greatest tennis player ever. To me, he's a ballet dancer. His footwork is the best I've even seen on any tennis player. For an absolutely engrossing analysis of how he does it, click here.

2009 U.S. Open Tennis Schedule: TV coverage of the US Open is around the clock -- presently on ESPN2, ESPN2HD and the Tennis Channel, and then later on CBS. The full schedule is on USOpen.org. Here's today:

Watch it on HD. It's better than being there. And much more fun than watching stock prices.

Yippee! I've been "discovered." I'm now on a list for deliriously wonderful press releases. I don't make this stuff up. My latest :

New Book Reveals God’s Stimulus Package

Tulsa, OK - July 2, 2009) Long before Washington D.C. announced a stimulus package, God provided for his followers. God’s economic stimulus plan is revealed in Daniel King’s new book, The Secret of Obed-Edom.

“At the beginning of his life, Obed-Edom was disadvantaged. He was extremely poor, disenfranchised and known as a slave, but then he got hooked up to God’s economic stimulus package and by the end of his life, he had wealth beyond his wildest dreams,” says Daniel King, the author of The Secret of Obed-Edom.

“Obed-Edom is the greatest undiscovered story in the Bible. Hardly anyone has ever heard of this obscure Bible character but his life story is so amazing that I think that everyone in America should read this book,” says Daniel King, “Especially with the current economic crisis the secrets of Biblical success are now needed more then ever before.”

“The Secret of Obed-Edom is really the secret to my own success,” explains Daniel, “When I was young, my parents were extremely poor. We did not have a house so we actually lived in a school bus in a parking lot for six months. But, by the time I wrote this book, my office was near the top of a sixty-story skyscraper and from my office window I could see the parking lot my family used to live in. God brought me a long way and in my new book I reveal how God can do the same miracles for you.”

The Secret of Obed-Edom will teach you how to activate God’s plan for wealth creation in your life. Hidden in this book are the secrets of Godly promotion and how to achieve unprecedented wealth in your life. Order your copy today by calling: 1-877-431-4276.

Daniel King is a missionary evangelist who has visited over fifty nations preaching the Gospel. His goal is to lead 1,000,000 people to Jesus every year! Learn more about his ministry by visiting: www.kingministries.com

Religion is the best business in the world. Ultra-low variable costs. Huge margins. Guaranteed income stream if you don't mess up, like have an affair and get caught. There's even a web site that helps you raise money for your religion or for your "Cause of the day." It's called Click&Pledge. Its slogan is "a better way to do good." Click here.

I really don't make this stuff up.

Cash for Codgers
Democrats, realizing the big success of the President's "Cash For Clunkers" rebate program, have revamped a major portion of the Obama Health Care Plan.

President Obama, Speaker Pelosi, and Sen. Reid are expected to make this major announcement at a joint news conference early next week. I have obtained an advanced copy of the proposal which is named....

"CASH FOR CODGERS" and it works like this... Couples wishing to access health care funds to pay for the delivery of a child will be required to turn in one old person on the day of the delivery. The amount the government grants them will be set according to a sliding scale. Older and more prescription-dependent codgers will pay the highest amounts.

Special bonuses will be paid for those submitting codgers in targeted groups, such as smokers, alcohol drinkers, persons 10 pounds over their government-prescribed weight -- and any member of the Republican Party.

Smaller bonuses will be given for codgers who consume beef, soda, fried foods, potato chips, lattes, whole milk, butter, cheese, bacon, Brussel sprouts or Girl Scout Cookies.

All codgers will be rendered useless via a toxic injection -- similar to that given the engines of the 'clunker' trade-ins. This will insure that they, like the vehicle 'clunkers', are not secretly resold or their body parts harvested to keep other codgers in repair and living amongst us.

Since I fit several of the categories, I should be gone soon. I'll miss you.


This column is about my personal search for the perfect investment. I don't give investment advice. For that you have to be registered with regulatory authorities, which I am not. I am a reporter and an investor. I make my daily column -- Monday through Friday -- freely available for three reasons: Writing is good for sorting things out in my brain. Second, the column is research for a book I'm writing called "In Search of the Perfect Investment." Third, I encourage my readers to send me their ideas, concerns and experiences. That way we can all learn together. My email address is . You can't click on my email address. You have to re-type it . This protects me from software scanning the Internet for email addresses to spam. I have no role in choosing the Google ads on this site. Thus I cannot endorse, though some look interesting. If you click on a link, Google may send me money. Please note I'm not suggesting you do. That money, if there is any, may help pay Michael's business school tuition. Read more about Google AdSense, click here and here.