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8:30 AM EST, Friday, November 2, 2007: Dumb me. I recommended everyone stay away from financials, especially those with subprime mortgage exposure. But I forgot to tell you to sell short. Look what's happened to Citigroup.

The number one key to reading this column: Recognize Harry has (occasionally) a great idea. But he doesn't always connect all the dots. What with his morning deadline and all that. You need to figure your own conclusions.

The market dropped over 2% yesterday. I don't believe the drop was justified by the news -- Citigroup downgrade, lower earnings from Exxon, Chrysler's 11,000 job losses. All this means there will be bargains around today. "Stocks on sale."

Flagship privileges at Vanguard: If you have money with Vanguard (and everyone should), they will make you a Flagship member. I don't know how much you have to have. One of the benefits of this ultra-exclusive club -- no wisecracks about admitting me, please -- you get to invest in funds closed to other investors. I don't know why they're closed, nor why they're open to me (of all people). I asked Muriel Fullam, my wonderful assistant (of over 25 years), to track them. Here are their results. Not shabby at all. Check out the Precious Metals and Mining Fund. Australians have an expression: a lot better than a slap in the belly with a cold fish.

Practice saying NO. Say NO to other peoples' ideas on how you should "invest" (spend) your money. Repeat after me: NO.... NO.....NO. Remember, It's your money and you're allowed to invest it, spend it, waste it in whatever intelligent (or dumb) way you wish.

NO is the hardest word in the English language. NO is the most important word in the English language.

How many times does this happen? You get excited by a great investment idea. Turkey, for example. Then you do a little checking, find a wonderful fund called Turkish Investment Fund (TKF), which invests in a broad range of Turkish companies. You check it out. You find this recent miserable performance:

Of course, chart lie. If I had charted on a monthly (not weekly), things would have looked a bit better:

My conclusion on Turkey? Great place to visit. Super place to vacation. Maybe a nice place to buy property if you can find something cheap. But not a great place to invest from afar.

Webhoster ICDSoft is super: A pleasure to work with and cheap. Easy to open a family site, with family emails and other neat features. ICDSoft.com.

I love this Geox shoe: Light, comfortable and perfect for traveling. It's called U Monet 3, color coffee. Now on sale in limited sizes at Shoes.com and probably other places.

Geox's Monet Coffee slip-on.

The wedding invitation you always wanted to receive:

A friend sent these two photos. His moral? "Even when you've having a really bad day, someone will still screw you." I feel for the dead mouse and for my friend's sick humor.

The world's worst pun
A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and hears some music. No one is around, so he starts searching for the source.

He finally locates the origin. It is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads: Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770-1827. Then he realizes that the music is the Ninth Symphony and it is being played backwards. Puzzled, he leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to return with him.

By the time they arrive back at the grave, the music has changed. This time it is the Seventh Symphony, but like the previous piece, it is being played backward.

Curious, the men agree to consult a music scholar. When they return with the expert, the Fifth Symphony is playing, again backward. By the next day the word has spread and a throng has gathered around the grave. They are all listening to the Second Symphony being played backward.

Just then the graveyard's caretaker ambles up. Someone in the crowd asks him if he has an explanation for the music.

"Oh, it's nothing to worry about" says the caretaker. "He's just decomposing!"

Great news:
Daughter Claire passed the Massachusetts Bar Exam (for lawyers) on her first try -- a testimony to Claire's years of hard work and her mother's superior intelligence.

Picture of smiling father and radiant Claire (now real lawyer) at her recent wedding to Ted Murray Maloney-Newton.

This column is about my personal search for the perfect investment. I don't give investment advice. For that you have to be registered with regulatory authorities, which I am not. I am a reporter and an investor. I make my daily column -- Monday through Friday -- freely available for three reasons: Writing is good for sorting things out in my brain. Second, the column is research for a book I'm writing called "In Search of the Perfect Investment." Third, I encourage my readers to send me their ideas, concerns and experiences. That way we can all learn together. My email address is . You can't click on my email address. You have to re-type it . This protects me from software scanning the Internet for email addresses to spam. I have no role in choosing the Google ads. Thus I cannot endorse any, though some look mighty interesting. If you click on a link, Google may send me money. Please note I'm not suggesting you do. That money, if there is any, may help pay Claire's law school tuition. Read more about Google AdSense, click here and here.
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