In Search of the Perfect Investment

Earnings season is beginning. It looks weak.

The market is priced highly — about 19 P/E.

Some tech stocks like Amazon, Alibaba, Facebook and MSFT,  are holding in. But others like Salesforce and Netflix are weak.

I can’t play games with Yahoo and Twitter.

I thought Europe would work with VGK, but it’s ebbing also.

The bloom has gone off  gold. I’ve cut my position.

Don’t fight the Fed. Rising interest rates means it’s not a good time for equities.

I don’t know what this means. But going to war with Russia is not my favorite dream. This is from the Daily Mail in England.

 The order is to bring home all kids — despite them being in the middle of a school year and despite the school fees having been paid. For the full piece, click here.

For a fictional look at what Putin is planning, read Tom Clancy’s Commander in Chief:

It’s all about how we ended up going to war with Russia. It’s frightening stuff if you watch what Russia is doing in Syria and the Baltic. I’m about 80% into it. It’s engrossing.

For the book, click here.

Useful things learned

1. You can get photos off your iPhone in two ways. You can email them to yourself. You can attach the phone to your computer with a USB cable. Bingo, the iPhone becomes an external drive.

2. For God’s sake, if someone offers you business, return their phone call.

3. If FedEx asks you to change your credit card, don’t use their awful web site. Call on the phone. Ask them about a discount on your shipments. Asking works.

4. Don’t leave your airline boarding passes around. They contain stuff you don’t want the bad guys to know. It’s all in the computer symbol.

5. It’s always the cable. When something breaks, check the cable first. It’s loose or broken.

6. Chap-Stick works on dry skin and cuts everywhere, not just lips.

Watch your cable provider.

Comcast has been fined $2.3 million for billing its customers for services they didn’t order, or want.

My DirecTV is on auto-pay. The bill has been edging up, for no reason. I haven’t added anything. They just make stuff up. The bill got up to $183.36 a month. I checked Dish for the same stuff. It was $70.99 plus tax.

That made Dish less than half of DirecTV.

I called DirecTV. I told them I’d pay $110 a month or switch to Dish. They cut it to $109.

The lesson: All cable providers and all telecom companies are heavily into bill obfuscation. Think of them as a telecom Wells Fargo. They make stuff up and add it to your bill, figuring most of us won’t check.

My next target is Verizon. Their bills give incomprehensibility a whole nw meaning.

I don’t try to understand the bills. No one can.  My strategy is simple: This is how much I’ll pay, or go to AT&T (i.e. your competitor). Do it.

“Women: tweet me your first assaults.” From the New York Times Evening Brief:

For many women, Mr. Trump’s “locker room talk” brought back memories of abuse — and they shared their stories on social media.

And our sportswriter Bill Pennington, who has been paid to stand around in locker rooms for the better part of 30 years, said that what he’s heard in locker rooms is nothing “even close” to descriptions of sexual assault — more like municipal bond portfolios, aches and pains, and what to feed the cat.

Samsung’s nice present to Apple

Samsung killed its Galaxy Note 7 smartphone, now infamous for bursting into flames.The device was meant to be Samsung’s answer to the iPhone, and its demise is a major setback.

If you have a Galaxy Note 7, shut it off right now and trade it on a free Samsung non-inflammable phone.

Here’s Apple over the last 12 months. It’s been a roller-coaster ride.

Apple is a curious stock. It reflects several things:

1. The lack of real innovation out of a company acutely missing Steve Jobs.

2. The difficulty of finding new techie things the world wants. It’s not AI (artificial intelligence), VR (virtual reality) or driverless cars. They’re niche products.

I wish Apple would make my Apple Watch useful and reliable. Their new Watch software has made my Apple Watch worse. For God’s sake, don’t buy an Apple Watch.

Latest election cartoons:

Today is Yom Kippur. Here is the classic Yom Kippur tale:

Ring. Ring.

“Hi. This is Sarah Palin. Is Senator Lieberman in?”

“No, governor. He’s out today. This is Yom Kippur.”

“Well, hello, Yom. Can I leave a message?”

Harry Newton, who feels healthy and has son Michael visiting this weekend. Good health for you and the kids. What more could anyone want?