In Search of the Perfect Investment

Back in New York to a pile of Christmas gift catalogs that wouldn’t quit and the excellent news that I’ll now be getting $1,718.40 a month from social security.

I once sent them a check for $40 million in taxes.

So $1,718.40 a month is an excellent return.

Should I do the IRR calculation?

An amazing number of people are begging for Christmas presents — from the guy who delivers our left-wing newspaper to the nice people at the car park who scratch up our car.

My eye doctor billed Medicare $500. Medicare approved $220.36 and paid $176.29. AARP paid $44.07.

Go figure.

But we can be grateful and happy, since there are powerful healthcare forces rooting for us.

Remember Martin Shkrell, the 32-year old CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals? He bought and raised the price of an old drug from $13.50 to $750 a pill.

He’s apparently very bright, and now very rich. For a fascinating article, “The Bad Boy of Pharmaceuticals Hits Back, click here.

This is fraud. Do not open the attachment. I received this email this morning:

This is getting really boring: The bank is right. It’s fraud. The thief is testing my account before ripping it off:

Thoughts for a desultory day:

And for your silly quiz

Retiree Mental Fitness Evaluation

Giraffe Test

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Stop and think about it and decide on your answer before you scroll down.

The correct answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

Elephant Test

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?

Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

Lion King Test

3. The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend … except one. Which animal does not attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.

Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

Crocodile Test

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Haven’t you been paying attention? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Conference.

According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, 90% of the Retirees they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson says this conclusively proves that most retirees do not have the brains of a four-year-old.

Harry Newton who sent out the real estate syndication materials on the weekend. If you didn’t get yours, email me.

VW’s sales are plummeting. It’s being hit with all sorts of large government penalties. Yet its shares are climbing:

 I sold them short, thinking VW was a cockroach stock — which it is. Bad news has piled on top of bad news. I covered quickly when I saw the market didn’t agree with me. I was wrong for all the right reasons.

Hence, this is the single biggest investment lesson of our lives:

Get out when you’re wrong. Get out fast. And move on. You don’t want the drain in your brain of watching your losses mount.

2015 may end us as the first year in seven that cash out performed stocks, and most bonds. I just got word that my favorite commodities fund is down 22.96% for 2015. Oil today is way under $40. It’s been a hard year, though residential real estate at moderate $700 to $1,100 monthly rents is doing fine.